"Grieving the loss of a child is a process, it begins the day your child passes and ends the day the parent joins them."

Friday, December 18, 2009

The second time around...

Yesterday, Dec 17th, was our anniversary. It was our 10th year. The second time around! For those of you who don't know our history. Boring to some and interesting to others...here it goes. Paul and I started dating while in high school. I was 17. Paul was 18. We married in May 1986, the first time around, at the tender age of 20 & 21. Ashleigh was born at the end of that same year. Bradley came along in Nov of 1989.

Fast forward to 1991. Paul and I divorced. We sold our brand new home and went our separate ways. The kids with me. I rented a small house that my parents owned. Paul moved to the Detroit area.

Moving right along to 1997. By this time, our anger toward one another finally started to subside. Our kids were constantly begging both of us to go with them to the fair, movies, school activities...etc. We both caved each time they asked both of us to do things with them. Eventually, Paul and I decided that we were getting along very well. After many conversations and spending lots of time together, we decided to try living together. Our thoughts were, if we could get along so well, we owed it to our kids to at least try one more time. And so we did.

By the time Paul moved back in. I had bought some land and had a modular home put on it. The kids and I had been living here about 1 year. We all were together again. Boy did we have one happy little boy. Bradley was in HEAVEN having his daddy back home. Ashleigh was too, but it was just different for Brad.

December 17, 1999. Paul and I headed to the court house with my brother and sister in-law as witnesses, and got married...the second time around. The kids knew we were getting married again, but opted out of going to the court with us. It was Christmas time and their school parties were going on that day. Plus, they thought it was cheesy!

Now, here's a question for you all. Which anniversary would you celebrate? We really don't celebrate either. Maybe because we aren't sure which one we should be celebrating! HaHa! At any rate, the second time around for us, has proven to be so much better than the first time around.

The best result of our getting re-married is of course CARLY! I think Ashleigh and Brad would agree also :0)


Michele Risner said...

Happy Anniversary!

Kristen said...

A real, true "Parent Trap" love story! That is sweet.

And that is a very good question. I'm not sure which anniversary I would celebrate either. I think what I'd do is pick a different date than the two anniversary dates, like Valentine's Day so it's easy to remember, and celebrate your marriage on that day.

Just like birthdays, it is a day to remember and turn your focus to that one person, and reflect on what their life brings to this world. I think having a day to celebrate marriage keeps it young and romantic.

Happy Anniversary!!

Mommy to those Special Ks said...

That is so neat! It's like a movie!!! :) Guess you're just meant to be together forever! Happy Anniversary!!!!

Heather said...

Such a great love story and although I already knew you "story",I so loved hearing it again.Happy Anniversary!

Erin said...

Happy Anniversary!

What an amazing story! As the child of divorced parents, I can only imagine what your honest attempt to reconcile your differences meant to Ashleigh and Brad!

Heidi said...

What a great story! Happy Anniversary!!!

Stephanie said...

What a great story !!! I guess it was inevitable that you reunite, I mean Carly was waiting to make her grand appearance!
I think it's awesome! Happy Anniversary!!!!

Michelle said...

happy anniversary! (I think I would celebrate the 2nd one) and a beautiful love story you have to share...love can conquer all :)

Mary said...

Happy Anniversary!