"Grieving the loss of a child is a process, it begins the day your child passes and ends the day the parent joins them."

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Thursdays rant!

I don't know about anyone else, but I feel that this has been the longest week ever! I'm so thankful tomorrow is Friday.

Today was a busy day. Off to mail taxes this morning. Banking. Then to my moms to compose a letter to the School Board, Special Ed Director and the Elementary Principal. That letter took me over 3 hours to complete. I'd type it. Mom would proof it. I add things to the letter. Took things out of the letter. It was quite the process. After the letter was finally complete. I printed off a copy for each of the above and headed off to the school to hand deliver each letter.

Arriving at the school in time for recess. I kind of planned it that way. I wanted to see if Carly was outside today. I told her this morning to go outside at recess and play with her friends and have fun. Course, I tell her to have fun every single morning as she is waving and blowing kisses at me from the bus window. So, I get to the school and head outside. I couldn't find her. Shocker..likely 'cuz there are 6 classrooms out all together! I finally asked a playground aide, who kindly pointed Carly out to me. I stood back, in the shadows so to speak. I did not want Carly to see me. I want to observe from afar. If she sees me...she clams up. At first, I was not too happy about what I was seeing. Carly just standing, watching. Watching the kids climb and play on the monkey bars. I know she was wishing she could climb and play too, but she can't do that without assistance. Eventually, she plopped down on the ground and watched. It took all I had within me to not go to her rescue. But, I just watched. Finally, after about 10 minutes a couple of little girls from her class came and sat with her. I couldn't hear what was being said, but I saw the three of them laughing and tickling each other. Until Carly had had enough and pushed their hands away. Then, all three girls jumped up and ran. Yes even Carly. When Carly runs, it's nothing like her peers. Thanks to that stupid blood infection that caused her brain to swell..leaving permanent damage/weakness to her left side. When you watch Carly walk, she walks with a very obvious limp, for lack of better word.

Next up, the slide. Carly climbed the play structure and headed to a slide. Then she changed her mind and turned back around. I was disappointed. But then, to my surprise she headed to another slide at the opposite end of the play structure. She went down! I was so happy to see that. When she got to the bottom, she was all smiles! She was having fun. Something that doesn't happen all to often for Carly while at school.

As recess went on. I watched. She and her 2 little friends walked over to the asphalt, got into a circle while holding hands. Swinging their arms and giggling. It melted my heart. And then the whistle blew. It took the recess aides a couple of minutes to convince Carly that it was time to go back to class. Eventually she complied. Off she went.

In regards to the letter. Paul and I have put in writing our concerns including, asking for a Certified ASL (sign language) Para Pro., for next year. We've informed them that Carly will be going on a reduced schedule. I included the fact that we feel she is bored. Is receiving very little interaction from her aide and teacher. We know she doesn't get any encouragement. We've requested that she immediately be removed from Spanish class. I mean seriously. This little girl barely speaks English. Spanish class is a big old waste of time. For my daughter that is. I included many issues that you all have been reading about throughout this school year. I'm sure this will grab some major attention. At least, that's what we're hoping for. We just feel like we need to get a grip on this. NOW. It isn't going to get any better unless this school knows that we mean business. I'm through taking crap from this school.

Dr. Phil is on right now. They're talking about special needs kids being abused at school. By the hands of the so called professionals. Unfreaking believable what I'm seeing on my television. If I EVER saw, or found out that anyone at that school, or any school for that matter, abused and I mean physically abused Carly. I'm quite certain, I would kill them. There, you have it. I would kill someone over Carly. OMG. One teacher actually killed a student by restraining him. This teacher was a female, 6ft tall and over 230lbs. She restrained this boy (7th grader) face down on the floor and she sat on him. She crushed his chest. So badly so, that the coroner said it was comparable to a car crash victim. Guess what?? This teacher didn't even go to jail! An attorney/special needs advocate is on the show too. She advises parents to be aware. Especially to kids who are basically non verbal. Which Carly is considered by the school. Great. Just great. I should have turned the stupid TV off.

Like I said,,, I'm so thankful this week is almost over. Whew...what a week!

Sorry for venting. I promise, I will stop. First, I would like to thank those of you who are leaving me comments of encouragement. It means quite a bit to me. Hopefully, through our awful experience, it will give you all a heads up when your little ones start school. I didn't have any idea what we were in for. Man, what a ride.


Rochelle said...

Praying for you guys that a great solution comes out of all of this for Carly!

Regina said...

Thanks for sharing because I know I will also have a fight on my hands when my little one goes to school. Your posts have given me a lot to watch out for! Still hoping things work out for Carly!

Meghan said...

Vent away! I mostly lurk, but I had to comment after your rough couple of days. My heart breaks for Carly and for you. I hope you get the school's attention.

Me said...

I'm sorry you are going through all of this. Good for you though for being such a strong advocate for Carly. I feel I fall short in that area, I'm not a strong person at all. I hope you get everything you and Carly need and that she doesn't suffer any more.

my family said...

I hope your weekend and next week goes better. praying for you all.I think reduced day sounds best forC right now too.

Heather said...

Just catching up.So sorry you have been sad and dealing with all of this.All I can say is that Carly is so very,very lucky to have you as her mommy.Truly lucky.Hoping resolutions come quickly.. for everyone's sake,especially Carly.

PS.thanks for worrying about us.Nice to know we are loved.

Tina said...

I pray that things start to look better for Carly, she deserves the best. That was so sweet what you witnessed in the playground, at least something to bring a smile to your face and ours :)

Michelle said...

aawww....I'm sure it was hard seeing her at first just standing at the playground, but then to have some measure of comfort witnessing other kids that did interact with Carly and laugh with her and then seeing her having fun on the slide.

I hope the letter you wrote really gets through to the people that need to see it!